One is the loneliest number that you’ll ever do.

Since Roger LeLievre was out yesterday, I had to do the weekend entertainment video by myself.

It got really, really weird.

In which I give an opinion on something I know extremely little about.

I admit that I have never seen “Dancing With the Stars,” so I have no basis for what I’m about to say other than the headline I read in yesterday’s paper:

Yamaguchi wins ‘Dancing with the Stars’

Well… Ummm… Duh.

It’s like a headline that says Agassi wins ‘Badminton with the Stars.’

I think, from what I’ve gleaned, that the purpose of the show is to pair otherwise unqualified celebrities with professional dancers and see who can dance better or something like that. Somehow a professional figure skater seems pretty qualified to me.

I will now get back to trying to track down Drew Barrymore. I will let you in on this confidential newsroom tidbit: I have just obtained a cell phone photo from a woman who met Drew on the streets of Ypsilanti on Tuesday.

Rumor also has it that Drew dined at the Wolverine, but those ladies ain’t talkin’.

Soon we’ll all be rich!

Come for the carnage. Stay for the booty-shaking.

So I know that I’ve ragged on them before for churning out the same-old-same-old, so I have to give props (excited props, actually) to the folks at The Bang!, who are taking their show on the road.

Here it is, straight from the mouth – well, keyboard – of Bang! priestess Dru:

this thursday may 22. your number one mixtape sex-plosion dance party the Bang! boxing ! wrestling! sexual dance power like never before! believe it.

the bang! detroit. boxing. wrestling. blood on the dance floor.

the bang! comes to the Detroit’s DIA and brings you the biggest & wildest night of your life. Dance madness. real boxing. men in tights.
the bang!

I think it sounds AWESOME. Because boxing is sweet. And I’m pissed that I can’t go. But rest assured, I’m sure, that in addition to the carnage, there will still be plenty of drunk, dancing people with cool hair.

Robot ponies for Video Monday.

Oh my. First let me tell you how this happened.

I was writing my weekly Ypsi nightlife column, and I needed to check out one of the artists coming to the Dreamland Theater next weekend (a week from this coming weekend… I work WAY in advance).

I typed in her link.

And I found this.

I was so excited I had to stop what I was doing just to open a new window and tell you about it.

Then I went to youtube and found this:

And she’s coming to OUR LITTLE TOWN! Well, I live in Ann Arbor, so Ypsi’s not really MY little town. But it’s close enough. And I used to work there. And some of my best friends live in Ypsi. Well, at least they used to.

Laura Barrett is at the Dreamland Theater, 26 N. Washington, in Ypsi on Saturday, May 31 at 8 p.m. Tickets are $8 in advance, $10 at the door. For advance tickets: www.menomenology.com.

The demise of Andrew’s Bar. The birth of two dorks.

Roger LeLievre and I had been wondering about Andrews Bar in Ypsi for a little while. We heard rumors that it was closed, we heard nothing about new events there (although already scheduled events are still popping up on calendars), and Roger’s attempts to contact the owner went unanswered. We drove by there last week and it looked pretty abandoned.

Today I checked their myspace, which has been changed to Andrew’s Bar Memorial Pancake Breakfast.

The bar is no more. Closed. Done.

I would try to bring you more in-depth commentary, but no one’s talkin’.

BUT, on a lighter note, an mlive.com commenter called Roger and me “two dorks” in a comment today. To which Roger replied, “hey! at least someone watched our video!”